D.R. Mission trip 2011

Driving to the airport yesterday from Santiago gave me a lot of time to reflect on the life I was going back to. As I thought about my reality and perspective before spending a week with the loving, generous and welcoming Dominicans I began to fear returning and falling back into the same self-focused, self-dependant way of life. Just as I had brought clothes, shoes and Bibles from home to leave in the D.R. I wanted to bring home more than 6 boxes of skim ice and tons of pictures documenting the memories we made. I wanted to bring back some of the Dominican values and priorities. I learned so much from the people I was there to serve and minister to. These things I did not want to forget to the point that no change occurs and I fall right back into the same patterns of our society. God revealed to me though that rather than fearing I needed to resolve to be transformed by my renewed mind. To make such drastic changes in a world that is full of distractions, pressures and lies is too difficult to achieve on my own but that is where dying to my flesh and being led by the Spirit becomes most important. Devoting an entire week to growing in the Lord and making Him known was so fulfilling. After all it was a taste of the abundant life God created us for. John 10:10 says that the enemy comes to seek, kill and destroy and He uses the distractions, pressures and fears of the world to deceive us and take our focus off of God. God has come though that we may have life and have it abundantly. Having time away from the things the enemy uses to distract me at home (agendas, fears, anxieties, selfishness.....etc) and to be outwardly focused when my inclination tends to be self-focused gave me an opportunity to get a taste of a much sweeter life. A life that I want to become my new reality. In the Dominican Republic people are truly dependent on the Lord for their daily needs. Their concerns are all about surviving and so they go to the source of life to give them the resources they need: food, water, a home, a job, money...etc They place their hope in the Lord rather than the things we place our hope and security in daily ( people, money, ourselves, our goals and successes) We go to these sources that fail us and never satisfy while they go to Jesus who will never fail us but will fully satisfy the deepest longings of our hearts. Focusing on God aligns our heats with His as we discover what really matters~ the purpose that He has created us for. We go to well for water that will eventually dry out but God desires for us to believe and live like we believe that He is the source of living water~ a fountain that keeps on flowing. "This water that Jesus offers us will become a fountain of water springing up into everlasting life (John 4:14) He will do immeasurably more than al we could ask or imagine in and through us when drink of His living water. When we drink of this water Jesus promises that we will never go thirsty again. We will be like a well-watered tree that thrives and branches out to reach others, bearing good fruit. That is the kind of person that I want to be1 Filled with the Spirit so that I can reach out to meet the needs of those around me in my family, friends, community and throughout the world. That is what we were created for was to make an impact for the kingdom of God. My relationship with the Lord can not stop at filling me up but it must outflow into the lives of others. We are but cracked jars of clay until God,our potter fixes our cracks and restores us for His purpose. Each of us are unique yet filled by te same God to overflow with His love, grace and power! Some of my favorite memories from the trip were feeding the kids at the hole, getting to share my testimony with the girls at basketball camp, visiting the Monton's home, worshipping the same God in two languages, and just serving and having community with my brothers and sisters in Christ! The last thing I can have all the time at home if I keep my eyes on Jesus~ pursuing Him alone and aligning my heart with His. I want the abundant life my god created me for. he promises that when we seek Him passionately we will discover it! I want to challenge you to do the same and I am sure that when you take hold of that life God intended us to live you will not want to turn back. I am so thankful for the opportunity I had to go on this trip for the lessons God taught me. 

~Love, Hil

Giving Jesus full Lordship

Jesus, making you Lord of everything is not easy for me. God, I release the things that come easy for me but I have been so stubborn with the areas of my life that I want control of ~ people-pleasing, perfectionism and deception. My soul longs to be near to you, God but my flesh is interfering with me going deeper with you. I want to be passionate for You Jesus but that takes full surrender. You are showing me that You will not relent until I surrender my all. My flesh wants control but again and again I have found that leaning on my own understanding only leads to destruction. I am so easily deceived but in You alone is complete truth and where truth is there is freedom. I am trading my fear and anxiety about my circumstances for a reverent fear of You. God, just as you give You also take away. I am completely dependent on You for life. Apart from You I can do nothing good but You compel me to walk in righteousness. I have realized that I accepted You as Savior, wanting all the benefits of a relationship with You, God but I never accepted You as Lord of my life by surrendering everything. I was comfortable where I was because my faith was not tested. Growing up in a Christian home, going to a private Christian school, spending time with Christian friends.....etc. I didn't need to surrender my life to You because I was not in a place where I recognized my dependence on You. Lord, when I graduated and tasted the world I started pursuing what I thought would satisfy the longings of my heart for love and acceptance. I developed a lifestyle of destructive habits which over time led me down a path toward anorexia. It was in this place of darkness and uncertainty that I realized my sin. I had not only deceived others but I had deceived myself. You shed light on my fragile state. I was a slave to sin, obeying my flesh. Taking the steps toward healing has been a tough process because I had such a stubborn, hardened heart towards Your truth. I felt like I was living in shackles and bondage to sin. Rather than turning my struggles with eating, people-pleasing, insecurity and perfection over to You I relied on self for healing. I slowly began to relinquish little by little areas of my life that I had kept from You as You softened my heart to Your Spirit. Praise the Lord that I have now seen that complete healing comes from total surrender. Realizing that I cannot but You can, I don't know or understand but I can trust that You do. I am so thankful my healing was not instant because it was over time that I developed habits of denying flesh and choosing truth, that my heart became softened and sensitive to Your Holy Spirit inside me. I can now say with full confidence that I am saved and am in the process of being sanctified "I have been crucified with Christ and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the flesh, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." Galatians 2:20 I have not yet obtained perfection for that is impossible here on earth but I am pressing on toward the goal of eternity with my Lord.That is the joy set before me! I am choosing not to dwell on my past but rather to embrace who I am today hopeful of further growth in the future. I have now seen that I can overcome the trials and struggles that I will face in this present life by the power of the blood of Jesus and the word of my testimony. My history is HIS STORY for me to share for His glory. In my life Lord, be lifted high! 

Now that I have seen I am responsible~ Faith without deeds is dead

My favorite Bible verse

The Fellowship of the Unashamed

I am a part of the fellowship of the Unashamed. I have the Holy Spirit
Power. The die has been cast. I have stepped over the line. The decision has
been made. I am a disciple of Jesus Christ. I won't look back, let up, slow
down, back away, or be still. My past is redeemed, my present makes sense,
and my future is secure. I am finished and done with low living, sight
walking, small planning, smooth knees, colorless dreams, tame visions,
mundane talking, chintzy giving, and dwarfed goals.

I no longer need preeminence, prosperity, position, promotions, plaudits, or
popularity. I don't have to be right, first, tops, recognized, praised,
regarded, or rewarded. I now live by presence, learn by faith, love by
patience, lift by prayer, and labor by power.

My pace is set, my gait is fast, my goal is Heaven, my road is narrow, my
way is rough, my companions few, my Guide is reliable, my mission is clear.
I cannot be bought, compromised, deterred, lured away, turned back, diluted,
or delayed. I will not flinch in the face of sacrifice, hesitate in the
presence of adversity, negotiate at the table of the enemy, ponder at the
pool of popularity, or meander in the maze of
mediocrity.

I won't give up, back up, let up, or shut up until I've preached up, prayed
up, paid up, stored up, and stayed up for the cause of Christ. I am a
disciple of Jesus Christ. I must go until He returns, give until I drop,
preach until all know, and work until He comes.

And when He comes to get His own, He will have no problem recognizing me. My
colors will be clear for "I am not ashamed of the Gospel, because it is the
power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes.." (Romans 1:16)

By Dr. Bob Moorehead

I'm Forgiven and loved

My mind has not been at peace or in order for a very long time. In fact it has been so long that I have forgotten what it was like to live at peace. Bogged down by the weight of my guilt and consumed with a list of work that needs to be done in my life in order to measure up and to rectify my past. I'm working a full-time job like I can earn my own salvation but God, You take me as I am. I have bought the lie that I still have work to do to clean myself up & come into Your presence, but you accept me for who I am and say that there is no condemnation for me. On the basis of Your grace, God I have received my salvation that is secure. I certainly did nothing to receive it and can not do anything to diminish it. Jesus, You died to rectify my past decisions and sins and Your blood commands my guilt to flee. You call me Your child and say that I am forgiven and set free from the grips of my past. My sin no longer defines me because I have resolved to walk in a new way of life. I am shaking the shackles off my feet so I can dance for Jesus and praise my God. I now give my life to follow in obedience everything I believe in, completely surrendered~ that is LIFE IN ABUNDANCE!!!! Often I am tempted to be hard on myself and question how I could fall into a sin like anorexia but the truth is the Lord was not surprised. In fact He knew every lie I would believe before I even heard it. He knows our very weaknesses and every fault. He knows our deepest sins that we have committed in what we thought was secret. Yet in spite of all of these things He stands with open loving arms to forgive & embrace us. God calls satan the accuser and I can say from experience that name is suiting. He knows that if he keeps us consumed with ourselves that will inhibit us from being useful for God. That scheme will no longer work with me though. I have figured him out! The devil is working over time to remind me of who I've been but I do not need to carry that weight and burden any longer. My history is His story. He says I can make beautiful things out of dust. It is in these precious promises from my Savior that I can find peace & rest for He says, "As far as the east is from the west , so far has He removed our transgressions from us." Psalm 103:12  Even when I feel like my mistakes and sins are too big for God to forgive He is MIGHTY TO SAVE! "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness." 1 John 1:9 The slate is washed clean and the offense is gone forever. He has already overcome every past, present and future sin I will commit towards Him because He rose and conquered the grave. As Charles Spurgeon put it, "You sin as a finite creature but the Lord forgives as the infinite creator." The reminder of my past is only an opportunity to show how God was mighty in my life and healed me from my sinful past. My future holds so much hope because of the joy set before me~ my salvation and eternity in the presence of my God. The son has set me free and I am free indeed! I am born again into the family of God adopted as His "set apart" daughter seeking only to be Holy and blameless in His sight alone. Not caught up in worldly standards or goals but rather striving to know God and make Him known. In my life be lifted high, Lord Jesus!